Date Like A Guy When It Comes To Being Exclusive

Date like a guy when it comes to being exclusive

When giving advice to my women members about dating, I always tell them to “date like a guy” until they have a commitment. The message here is date like a guy when it comes to being exclusive.

So often I’ll get a phone call or an e-mail that goes something like this: “Hi, Marla. Hey, thanks for all of your help. I’ve been on some really great dates, but I just met a guy last week at a party. We’ve only been out once, but I really like him, so I think I’ll hold off on dating anyone else and see how it goes with him.” Or, “Hi, Marla. Wow, thanks for introducing me to Mark. He’s everything I’m looking for, so you can put me on hold.”

No! No! No! Why put all of your eggs in one basket after one date, or even a few dates for that matter? Ladies, you can be sure that the guys are not operating that way. Sure, it does happen occasionally that two people just click from the get-go and are inseparable from then on, actually, that’s what happened with me and my husband, but more often than not, the guy is still looking around to see if there’s anything better out there, and he’s testing the waters with you while keeping his options open.

It just kills me when a gal puts herself on hold when she’s seeing a guy, but I know that he is not exclusive with her because he is still calling me to match him up! Until you have a commitment from a guy, my advice is to continue to date like a guy. That way you won’t waste your time or get as hurt if he decides to move on.

Also, talk of becoming exclusive, marriage or declaring your love too soon almost always ends in disaster. I matched up Emily and Greg. Greg lives in Miami, and Emily lives in L.A. Greg is going to be bi-coastal soon because of his business and is fine with meeting women from L.A. Greg came to town and took Emily out to a nice dinner and then to a jazz club afterward.

They really hit it off. He liked her a lot and even mentioned her coming to Miami to visit him. He left to go back home the next day, but called her twice a day for a week. They really were enjoying getting to know each other. Greg bought Emily a ticket to come and visit him just ten days after they met. She was ecstatic and hopped on the plane! Emily was there with him about five days when Greg called me. He told me that she is a lovely, warm, wonderful woman and that they were having a fabulous time together.

She was crazy about his dog, loved his house, was easy-going, and fit right in with everything. But he was completely turned off when she told him that she loved him and started talking marriage. They had only known each other a little over two weeks! He felt too much pressure and decided to break things off. If Emily had let things progress naturally and just enjoyed her time with Greg, who knows how it would have turned out? But the way she handled things guaranteed Greg running for the hills. So ladies, keep your cool, take your time, enjoy the process, and date like a guy!

~ Happy Dating!

And remember, date like a guy when it comes to being exclusive.

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